Oct. 14 - Looking Into The Eyes That Constantly Watches Me

Photo Credit: Dave Brosha (Used with his permission)

Verse of the Day:

And do not be conformed to this world [any longer with its superficial values and customs], but be transformed and progressively changed [as you mature spiritually] by the renewing of your mind [focusing on godly values and ethical attitudes], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His plan and purpose for you].

Romans 12:2 AMP

And from my reading today:

Psalm 84: 2; 5-7; 11-12

2. My soul (my life, my inner self) longs for and greatly desires the courts of the Lord;

My heart and my flesh sing for joy to the living God.

5-7. Blessed and greatly favored is the man whose strength is in You,

In whose heart are the highways to Zion.
6 Passing through the Valley of Weeping (Baca), they make it a place of springs;
The early rain also covers it with blessings.
7 They go from strength to strength [increasing in victorious power];
Each of them appears before God in Zion.

11-12 For the Lord God is a sun and shield;

The Lord bestows grace and favor and honor;
No good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly.
12 O Lord of hosts,
How blessed and greatly favored is the man who trusts in You [believing in You, relying on You, and committing himself to You with confident hope and expectation].

Oh, Lord, how I need You.

This morning, I found myself irritated by an indecisive slow driver and said, "Lord  give me grace", and within the next 3 seconds, I said "Look at this idiot driver..."

So Paul, I know what you meant when you said "15. For I do not understand my own actions [I am baffled and bewildered by them]. I do not practice what I want to do, but I am doing the very thing I hate [and yielding to my human nature, my worldliness—my sinful capacity].""...18 For I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my flesh [my human nature, my worldliness—my sinful capacity]. For the willingness [to do good] is present in me, but the doing of good is not. 19 For the good that I want to do, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want." (Romans 7:15; 18-19 AMP)

The struggle is real, Paul!

I smile anytime I think that I thought I was someone special, like one of God's favourites. I have been off FB since the beginning of October except to check and respond to messages. I am very active on FB. Well, has anyone commented they 'missed me'? Did anyone notice I was not posting?

Not a one, at least not a one who said anything.

I also know that if I am not in church, no one will notice or care. Some might be relieved. The only person who might care cannot attend because of chronic illness.

But there is One Who notices, One Whose notice I desperately seek. 

When I thought I had lost His attention, I died inside. 

But it was a lie. 

He was always looking. 

I just could not see His eyes. Those beautiful eyes I once looked into daily as I fell in love.

(See here.)

I want to experience that love all over again. 

To feel fully alive once again.

And so I ask You, God, to...

Breathe on me, Breath of God,

fill me with life anew,
that I may love what thou dost love,
and do what thou wouldst do. (Edwin Hatch)

Oct.5 - In Oceans Deep I Call Upon Him

Verse of the Day: 

 Seek the Lord while He may be found; Call on Him [for salvation] while He is near.

Isaiah 55:6 (AMP)

On a day like today, in 'oceans deep', I will call upon His Name and keep my eyes above the waves:

You call me out upon the waters,
The Great unknown where feet may fail.
And there I find you in the mystery;
In oceans deep my faith will stand.

So I will call upon your name
And keep my eyes above the waves.
When oceans rise my soul
Will rest in your embrace,
For I am yours and you are mine.

Your Grace abounds in the deepest waters,
Your Sovereign hand will be my guide.
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me;
You've never failed
And you won't stop now.

So I will call upon your name
And keep my eyes above the waves.
When oceans rise my soul
Will rest in your embrace,
For I am yours and you are mine.

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders.
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever you would call me.
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my savior.

I will call upon your name
Keep my eyes above the waves
My soul will rest in your embrace
I am yours and you are mine.
(Hillsong United Worship)

Nuggets from today's Scripture Reading:

Colossians 2:2-3Amplified Bible (AMP)

² [For my hope is] that their hearts may be encouraged as they are knit together in [unselfish] love, so that they may have all the riches that come from the full assurance of understanding [the joy of salvation], resulting in a true [and more intimate] knowledge of the mystery of God, that is, Christ, ³ in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge [regarding the word and purposes of God].

Christ is the mystery of God. Seeking Him, getting to know Him will unlock the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.

Psalm 77(AMP)

My voice rises to God, and I will cry aloud;
My voice rises to God, and He will hear me.
2 
In the day of my trouble I [desperately] sought the Lord;
In the night my hand was stretched out [in prayer] without weariness;
My soul refused to be comforted.
3 
I remember God; then I am disquieted and I groan;
I sigh [in prayer], and my spirit grows faint. Selah.
4 
You have held my eyelids open;
I am so troubled that I cannot speak.
5 
I have considered the ancient days,
The years [of prosperity] of long, long ago.
6 
I will remember my song in the night;
I will meditate with my heart,
And my spirit searches:

7 
Will the Lord reject forever?
And will He never be favorable again?
8 
Has His lovingkindness ceased forever?
Have His promises ended for all time?
9 
Has God forgotten to be gracious?
Or has He in anger withdrawn His compassion? Selah.
10 
And I said, “This is my grief,
That the right hand of the Most High has changed [and His lovingkindness is withheld].”

11 
I will [solemnly] remember the deeds of the Lord;
Yes, I will [wholeheartedly] remember Your wonders of old.
12 
I will meditate on all Your works
And thoughtfully consider all Your [great and wondrous] deeds.
13 
Your way, O God, is holy [far from sin and guilt].
What god is great like our God?
14 
You are the [awesome] God who works [powerful] wonders;
You have demonstrated Your power among the people.
15 
You have with Your [great] arm redeemed Your people,
The sons of Jacob and Joseph. Selah.

16 
The waters [of the Red Sea] saw You, O God;
The waters saw You, they were in anguish;
The deeps also trembled.
17 
The clouds poured down water;
The skies sent out a sound [of rumbling thunder];
Your arrows (lightning) flashed here and there.
18 
The voice of Your thunder was in the [b]whirlwind;
The lightnings illumined the world;
The earth trembled and shook.
19 
Your way [of escape for Your people] was through the sea,
And Your paths through the great waters,
And Your footprints were not traceable.
20 
You led Your people like a flock
By the hand of Moses and Aaron [to the promised goal].

Today, I wonder, is there anyone who notices me, who thinks of me, remembers anything good about me, prays for me?
Will you notice me today, Lord? I need You. Do not withhold Your favour.

Oct.4 Non-entity

Verse of the Day

[ Warnings and Instructions ] Do not boast about tomorrow, For you do not know what a day may bring.

Proverbs 27:1 AMP

 Nuggets from Scripture reading today:

Colossians 1:9-20Amplified Bible (AMP)

9 For this reason, since the day we heard about it, we have not stopped praying for you, asking [specifically] that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will in all spiritual wisdom [with insight into His purposes], and in understanding [of spiritual things], 10 so that you will walk in a manner worthy of the Lord [displaying admirable character, moral courage, and personal integrity], to [fully] please Him in all things, bearing fruit in every good work and steadily growing in the knowledge of God [with deeper faith, clearer insight and fervent love for His precepts]; 11 [we pray that you may be] strengthened andinvigorated with all power, according to His glorious might, to attain every kind of endurance and patience with joy; 12 giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified us to share in the inheritance of the saints (God’s people) in the Light.

The Incomparable Christ

13 For He has rescued us and has drawn us to Himself from the dominion of darkness, and has transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son, 14 in whom we have redemption [because of His sacrifice, resulting in] the forgiveness of our sins [and the cancellation of sins’ penalty].

15 He is the exact living image [the essential manifestation] of the unseen God [the visible representation of the invisible], the firstborn [the preeminent one, the sovereign, and the originator] of all creation. 16 For by Him all things were created in heaven and on earth, [things] visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities; all things were created and exist through Him [that is, by His activity] and for Him. 17 And He Himself existed and is before all things, and in Him all things hold together. [His is the controlling, cohesive force of the universe.] 18 He is also the head [the life-source and leader] of the body, the church; and He is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, so that He Himself will occupy the first place [He will stand supreme and be preeminent] in everything. 19 For it pleased the Father for all the fullness [of deity—the sum total of His essence, all His perfection, powers, and attributes] to dwell [permanently] in Him (the Son), 20 and through [the intervention of] the Son to reconcile all things to Himself, making peace [with believers] through the blood of His cross; through Him, [I say,] whether things on earth or things in heaven.

I've never felt more invisible or like a non-entity like today. 

So I really am in need of God's breath, breathing life into His Word and into me today.

Oct. 3 Peace because The Lord is near and He is Sufficient.

Verse of the Day:
Blessed [gratefully praised and adored] be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant and boundless mercy has caused us to be born again [that is, to be reborn from above—spiritually transformed, renewed, and set apart for His purpose] to an ever-living hope and confident assurance through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead,

 
The Lord Is Near

Nuggets from my Scripture reading:

Jeremiah 1:5a; 8 
5a -“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you [and approved of you as My chosen instrument], And before you were born I consecrated you [to Myself as My own];"
8 -"Do not be afraid of them [or their hostile faces],
For I am with you [always] to protect you and deliver you,” says the Lord."

Jeremiah 2:13
13 -"For My people have committed two evils:
They have abandoned (rejected) Me, the fountain of living water,
And they have carved out their own cisterns, Broken cisterns that cannot hold water."

Philippians 4: 4-8; 11b-13; 19

4 "Rejoice in the Lord always [delight, take pleasure in Him]; again I will say, rejoice! 5 Let your gentle spirit [your graciousness, unselfishness, mercy, tolerance, and patience] be known to all people. The Lord is near. 6 Do not be anxious or worried about anything, but in everything [every circumstance and situation] by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, continue to make your [specific] requests known to God. 7 And the peace of God [that peace which reassures the heart, that peace] which transcends all understanding, [that peace which] stands guard over your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus [is yours].

8 Finally, believers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God’s word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think continually on these things [center your mind on them, and implant them in your heart]."

 11b "...for I have learned to be content [and self-sufficient through Christ, satisfied to the point where I am not disturbed or uneasy] regardless of my circumstances. 12 I know how to get along and live humbly [in difficult times], and I also know how to enjoy abundance and live in prosperity. In any and every circumstance I have learned the secret [of facing life], whether well-fed or going hungry, whether having an abundance or being in need. 13 I can do all things [which He has called me to do] through Him who strengthens and empowers me [to fulfill His purpose—I am self-sufficient in Christ’s sufficiency; I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him who infuses me with inner strength and confident peace.]"

19 "And my God will liberally supply (fill until full) your every need according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus."

Psalm 75:7

7 - "But God is the Judge;
He puts down one and lifts up another."

Proverbs 24:17-18

17 -"Do not rejoice and gloat when your enemy falls,
And do not let your heart be glad [in self-righteousness] when he stumbles,
18 
18 -"Or the Lord will see your gloating and be displeased,
And turn His anger away from your enemy."

"Lord, thank You that I am set apart for Your purpose, that You knew me before I was formed in the womb.

Thank You that I need never to be afraid of hostile faces, for You are always near me.

Help me when the uneasiness and disquiet creep in, to immediately give it over to You. I am thankful that I can and that You want me to.

Help me to be content in plenty and in need. I have failed in the 'need' part for I have longed for the plenty in my need.

Thank You that I can do all things in Your sufficiency."

I was reminded today to face my fears, the lions that charge me, and that God wants to use the process in the 'voice' that He has given me. Here is a quote from a post I wrote Feb.2014:

"...From all that I have been reading, the raw material for your 'voice' is what has impacted you in such a way as to change you fundamentally.
As I look over my blog, I see those traumas, a heart broken by rejection, betrayal, racism, paternalism in missions, financial hardship, depression and by my own failures.
I also see that I love to do in-depth research to get a comprehensive understanding of what is flowing out of me. Perhaps that is why I like to quote from The Amplified Bible so much.

I'm not quite sure my voice can be defined right now. God is still working it out with me.
But right now, I want it to be the 'voice of truth' that nudges people to God and dispels the lies...."

"Lord, be formed in me. May my voice shout Your glory.

You are El Shaddai."

Oct.2 My Citizenship in Heaven

Verse of the Day

The fear of man brings a snare, But whoever trusts in and puts his confidence in the Lord will be exalted and safe.

Proverbs 29:25 AMP

Thankful for His Word today. The fear of man indeed brings a snare (Something that lures or entangles the unwary~Free Dictionary) that may cause paralysis, isolation, feelings of hostility, helplessness or hopelessness. I have to admit that I have been caught in this snare too may times. I'm afraid of vicious people, like one woman who spends all her energy plotting how to exact vengeance on anyone who exposes her evil intent; like people who maliciously dehumanize others to make themselves feel better about themselves.

Fear of man.

When I think about it, a specific feeling stemming from the fear of man has haunted me for a very long time. A fear that 'they' do not warmly welcome my existence has fed that emotion of not belonging anywhere.
In my mind, I belong where I am wanted.
I am wanted where people want to spend time with me.

In this season of my life, I have to admit, I am no longer on any invitation lists. 

It gives a deep longing for acceptance and belonging, and it has dawned on me that will probably never happen here on earth.

Here are some nuggets from my Scripture reading today:

Isaiah 66:2b (AMP)
“But to this one I will look [graciously],
To him who is humble and contrite in spirit, and who [reverently] trembles at My word and honors My commands."

Philippians 3:13-14 (AMP)
13 Brothers and sisters, I do not consider that I have made it my own yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the [heavenly] prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 3:20-2(AMP)
20 But [we are different, because] our citizenship is in heaven. And from there we eagerly await [the coming of] the Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ; 21 who, by exerting that power which enables Him even to subject everything to Himself, will [not only] transform [but completely refashion] our earthly bodies so that they will be like His glorious resurrected body.

And hence I look forward to stepping into my 'home' one day and having the warmest most welcoming entrance ever.
And to top it all, my Father will run to me, arms open, eyes brimming with love, and wrap me in a warm embrace. Smothered in unconditional love that fills every nook and cranny of my heart, soul and spirit.
Home at last.



Until then, I want to be the one He looks at graciously, one who is humble and contrite, who trembles at His Word and honours His commands.
I am so far from that picture right now.

So again, I pray, " Breathe in me, Breath of Life".

Oct.1 Breathe on me, Breath of God

Verse of the Day

“Blessed [morally courageous and spiritually alive with life-joy in God’s goodness] are you when people insult you and persecute you, and falsely say all kinds of evil things against you because of [your association with] Me. Be glad and exceedingly joyful, for your reward in heaven is great [absolutely inexhaustible]; for in this same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

Matthew 5:11-12 AMP

So much in my Bible reading today to ponder and pray. 

Thank You, Lord for the privilege, freedom and resources to access Your Word. May I never take for granted.

Isaiah 62: 6b-7, 11b-12 (AMP)

6b You who profess the Lord, take no rest for yourselves,

7 And give Him no rest [from your prayers] until He establishes Jerusalem

And makes her a praise on the earth.

11b “Look now, your salvation is coming [in the Lord];

Indeed, His reward is with Him, and His restitution accompanies Him.”

12 And they will call them “The Holy People,

The Redeemed of the Lord”; And you will be called “Sought Out, A City Not Deserted.”

Isaiah 64:4-5a; 8-9
4 For from days of old no one has heard, nor has ear perceived,
Nor has the eye seen a God besides You,
Who works and acts in behalf of the one who [gladly] waits for Him.
5a You meet him who rejoices in doing that which is morally right,
Who remembers You in Your ways.
8 Yet, O Lord, You are our Father;
We are the clay, and You our Potter,
And we all are the work of Your hand.
9 Do not be angry beyond measure, O Lord,
Do not remember our wickedness [our sin, our injustice, our wrongdoing] forever.
Now look, consider, for we are all Your people.

Psalm 73: 21-28 (AMP)

21 
When my heart was embittered
And I was pierced within [as with the fang of an adder],
22 
Then I was senseless and ignorant;
I was like a beast before You.
23 
Nevertheless I am continually with You;
You have taken hold of my right hand.
24 
You will guide me with Your counsel,
And afterward receive me to honor and glory.

25 
Whom have I in heaven [but You]?
And besides You, I desire nothing on earth.
26 
My flesh and my heart may fail,
But God is the rock and strength of my heart and my portion forever.
27 
For behold, those who are far from You will perish;
You have destroyed all those who are unfaithful and have abandoned You.
28 
But as for me, it is good for me to draw near to God;
I have made the Lord God my refuge and placed my trust in Him,
That I may tell of all Your works.

Lord, take now Your Word and breathe its life into the parched, numb, deadened cells of my heart.