LauraLee's Lifesong is hosting a giveaway and I am participating by writing how a song has impacted my life. I used to sing this song as a child in church, but many years ago after I had sung it the last Sunday in church, God brought it to mind and answered the prayer-words in this song in a way I will never forget.
“Cause Me To Come To Thy River…”
I could not fathom it. The anchor I had tied my life on had been rudely dislodged and I was adrift in a sea of pain that consumed me.
My fiancé had just broken off our engagement 2 months away from the scheduled wedding. This in itself was not the primary issue.
It was because I was a new immigrant and my fiancé had made this new terrifying country somewhat manageable, somewhat like how it used to be at home. He was also the recipient of my gift of compassion which I poured liberally as he had lost both kidneys and had ongoing health issues.
Then he said, “You are nothing to me, you never were…I just needed companionship”. He did not need it anymore. So here I was, lost, and discounted, devalued to nothing.
Then in my fog of pain, I looked to God, “For You to allow this to happen, there must be a reason…Teach me, my Lord.” Then suddenly I remembered having sung this song:
“Cause Me To Come To Thy River…”
I could not fathom it. The anchor I had tied my life on had been rudely dislodged and I was adrift in a sea of pain that consumed me.
My fiancé had just broken off our engagement 2 months away from the scheduled wedding. This in itself was not the primary issue.
It was because I was a new immigrant and my fiancé had made this new terrifying country somewhat manageable, somewhat like how it used to be at home. He was also the recipient of my gift of compassion which I poured liberally as he had lost both kidneys and had ongoing health issues.
Then he said, “You are nothing to me, you never were…I just needed companionship”. He did not need it anymore. So here I was, lost, and discounted, devalued to nothing.
Then in my fog of pain, I looked to God, “For You to allow this to happen, there must be a reason…Teach me, my Lord.” Then suddenly I remembered having sung this song:
Cause me to come to Thy river, O Lord Cause me to come to Thy river, O Lord Cause me to come to Thy river, O Lord Cause me to come Cause me to drink Cause me to live Cause me to drink from Thy river, O Lord Cause me to drink from Thy river, O Lord Cause me to drink from Thy river, O Lord Cause me to come Cause me to drink Cause me to live Cause me to live by Thy river, O Lord Cause me to live by Thy river, O Lord Cause me to live by Thy river, O Lord Cause me to come Cause me to drink Cause me to live (© 1974 Maranatha! Music)
This song had become reality this day. I had been singing it without realizing what it meant.
So, “Cause me..”, He did.
And I was never more needy to drink and live. In the next couple of months, He continued to show me that my words were important and that He is a holy God who would not allow me to use His Name or words flippantly. I had to say what I meant and mean what I say.
He had me look at my newly adopted country and its people through His eyes. I had been viewing myself as a victim of discrimination and using this to justify my coldness towards white Canadians.
He gently pointed out, “Who do you think you are? Do you really think that I have favorites? That you are better to me because you feel victimized?”
Then it struck me, most of the people I saw as ‘racist’ were simply ignorant or afraid of new people, people outside of their comfort zone.
And their sin was no greater than mine.
Here I was professing to be His child, going to Bible college to prepare for ministry, with a heart cold towards a sector of the family of God. There followed a time of repentance and forgiveness and wonderful reconciliation. My heart became so tender as I grew in intimacy with my Lord.
It was a time that sealed forever my faith, because whenever there are times when God feels absent, I KNOW He is present, I KNOW He loves me.
Since then, I pay attention to my words, His Words, words about Him, words to Him, for I know that He is holy, and that I will be held accountable. So take heed, think about what you say or sing. He is listening, and He may just take you at your word.
He gently pointed out, “Who do you think you are? Do you really think that I have favorites? That you are better to me because you feel victimized?”
Then it struck me, most of the people I saw as ‘racist’ were simply ignorant or afraid of new people, people outside of their comfort zone.
And their sin was no greater than mine.
Here I was professing to be His child, going to Bible college to prepare for ministry, with a heart cold towards a sector of the family of God. There followed a time of repentance and forgiveness and wonderful reconciliation. My heart became so tender as I grew in intimacy with my Lord.
It was a time that sealed forever my faith, because whenever there are times when God feels absent, I KNOW He is present, I KNOW He loves me.
Since then, I pay attention to my words, His Words, words about Him, words to Him, for I know that He is holy, and that I will be held accountable. So take heed, think about what you say or sing. He is listening, and He may just take you at your word.
5 comments:
My goodness, this is a magnificent testimony as to the power of God. Wow, what a work He did in you, and now it will glorify Him. I love the fact that since that time, you pay attention to His words in whatever form they come, whether through the Bible, through teaching or through song. Just beautiful
Thanks for entering. I'll be doing my drawing in just an hour or two, Lord willing, so you got in just in the nick of time! ;)
I have a PRAISE REPORT !!!!!!!!! GOD IS GOOD AND GREATLY TO BE PRAISED...
This post has moved me deeply, my dear friend. I knew there was depth and richness to your faith, wrought only by Him. Thank you for sharing what God's done in your heart. How many times I've sung a song or read a scripture without fully knowing what it meant at the time, only to have the Holy Spirit make it experiential and very real. It's life-changing when He does this.
A powerful witness to the river's healing and cleansing. What an incredibly, painful and confusing time that must have been for you, Sita. Hindsight brings wisdom, yet while we're going through it, we often cannot see the thread.
He's caused me to come to his river more often these days; perhaps, I am more willing to find my obedience in the matter.
peace~elaine
Sita,
Would you mind if I posted this as the "Lifesong in the Limelight" tomorrow on my blog? If so, just send me an email and lemme know. This moved me again, after a 3rd or 4th read. Very special.
Love,
LauraLee
Post a Comment